Wednesday, September 5, 2012

The clip moved

Does your kid have a clip? Oh, I bet they do if they are in any form of learning academy. For those of you who don’t understand, a clip is the behavior chart and my little buddy has one and has used his clip multiple times already….and he’s been in school a few days.

Just a little back story…I’m one of ‘those’ moms. You know the one who sits down to read with a very typical six year old BOY and he flips a few words around and doesn’t want to read at all and I’m broken hearted. The irony is I NEVER read for pleasure…other than the WORD and only to learn something about how cool Jesus is and my spiritual journey….typically. I read the Cliff Notes in high school… why would it be unusual to me that my kid isn’t really digging reading to me? Hmmmmmm……..and yet……

 I freak out and have him tested for dyslexia.  Help me…I beg you.

And…he’s fine. I paid a small fortune to find out that he reads more than age appropriately and he’s active. Awesome!!!

So, this is a glimpse into my summer and why this whole clip moving thing got me into a such a tizzy.

In order to encourage my child to be less active and LISTEN…..I offered the ultimate in reward to a six year old science and arachnid obsessed little boy…... A  TARANTULA for his birthday.  Because…..a tarantula only has to be fed one time a week and that poor thing might actually survive in our house only needing food one time per week. Good odds for Faulkners.  Oh me this is it, he is going to be the most incredible listener ever after this first eight weeks because he wants this worse than anything he’s ever wanted.

So, I rush back from my precious grandmother’s funeral to pick him up from school the first day….beyond ready to receive his excitement and fervor for a new year with the MARY POPPINS of a first grade teacher that he has, Mrs. Perkins. 

He gets in the car and sadly pronounces he got his clip moved to WARNING. YOU DID  WHAT?????????????? There is no way that my kid’s clip got moved the first day of school….no way, no way, no way. BUT…it did and I had to face it. So I emailed Mary Poppins to explain to her that this was devastating and we were ‘ON THIS’…..make no mistake.  And I went to my boy whose dreams of hairy spiders were dashed in a simple clip move for the moment and he was devastated.

I had had an emotional day to put it mildly and this sent me over the top…I cried…he cried….I went to my bed to cry as the weight of parenting fell on me...the single mom widow of two children trudging through the muck of a fallen world with no helper. And…I caved. I could not do this…I could not ‘make’ my kid behave….I could not ‘make’ him listen and because he was folding his paper and practicing his origami skill set during the instructions (which is why he got his clip moved).  I went into one of the darkest moments to date as a parent.  It’s ridiculous now….go ahead and laugh (especially you teachers)…..but in the moment I had failed.

As I got it together and walked from the kitchen back to the bathtub with the kids….HE …THE HE…THE HUSBAND TO THE WIDOW said this….’My grace is sufficient for you sweet girl.’

And it is…..and I wept because I knew in that moment….grace was radically bestowed on me when I didn’t deserve it and therefore I extend that to my own….not without consequence….but with love and compassion as we sit on the MERCY SEAT together. Jesus moved our clip back to orange when he DIED ….and that is where my clip stays when He sees me. Does He instruct and encourage? Oh yes HE does.…..right back to who WE are IN HIM.  

Davis….tomorrow is another day….another chance to show us all who you really are……and that is an amazing little boy who listens. Do it buddy!!!! Your tarantula awaits.

I truly think I needed Davis’s clip to be moved for me to feel grace and to know that HIS NAME IS JESUS.